English 101 – When Did We Forget??

I like to write, and I’m a fan of reading.

Unfortunately, I feel like I’m in a world where the printed word is becoming extinct.

I take it back, a world where “properly printed word” is becoming extinct.  This is especially true for the English language.

Allow me to give you a little background on why I feel this way.  My paternal family is composed mainly of educators:

• Grandma was a high school principal.
• Oldest aunt is an English teacher.
• Oldest uncle is a college professor at Syracuse University.
• Grandma’s sisters were teachers.
• Dad earned 2 degrees.

I’m like the redheaded stepchild cause getting me to finish school was like pulling teeth.  Being the redheaded stepchild in a black family is a bad thing……

But I like to laugh at myself.

Anyway, one thing that I did grow up with is a love of the spoken and printed word.  I’ve always loved reading and I’ve always loved writing, be it in printed or typed form.

This has unfortunately also created a severe abhorrence to PEOPLE WHO CAN’T WRITE.  Now, I’m not perfect folks, I make mistakes too, but there are certain basic rules that evidently are not taught in today’s schools.  This troubles me greatly because I see it more and more on in the workplace and in secondary school environments.

I was laughing at myself the other day cause my cell phone bill is so high…..why?  I’m a texting junkie.  I love this new-fangled technology; but I refuse to use all of the text jargon that comes with it.  It belittles the English language.  hence, when I text someone, it’s usually pretty long.

Now don’t get me wrong folks, I like to use slang too….but there’s a time and a place for it.  I’ve noticed that I’m getting less and less tolerant of common unchecked mistakes as I get older.  On any given day I’ll nominate myself as “the grammatical and punctuation police” and go on a tear about it.

For you folks that need a quick tutorial….here’s a list of my major gripes:

• Learn the difference between your and you’re; their, they’re and there; and its and it’s.  If you don’t know these rules, please look them up.  If there’s one thing that gets on my nerves, its someone that says “YOUR WELCOME”.  Did you know it’s a shortened version of “you are welcome”?  If you didn’t know this then go back to high school.
• Another one that gets on my nerves almost as much as the first bullet is when someone doesn’t know how to end a sentence and they let it just run on and on without any type of punctuation or break because it means that they’re (note the use of the word) not taking their time and they just want to complete their thought in one sentence.  Whew!!
• Over punctuating does not make you look smarter.  I see someone try to slip in an “apostrophe s” at least once per week.  Don’t know what an “apostrophe s” is?  Go back to school.  My boss does this all the time.  I nail him about it mercilessly.  It’ll probably get me fired one day.
• If you don’t know the meaning of a word, look it up before you use it.  Why is this so difficult?
• Just because you have spell-check on your (note my use of the word) word processing program, you are not excused from not knowing how to spell.  Look it in up in the dictionary.  Remember those?  It’s that big book that folks used to use to look up spellings and definitions.  They went out of style in 1989 and are now difficult to find.
• Just because I know what TY, UR and LOL stand for, it does not mean you’re (note my use of the word) going to get me to use them consistently.  This is especially true if I’m sending you a formal e-mail.
• Don’t change the “person” in mid-thought.  If you’re going to start with “I or me” then you have to do the entire thing that way.  Changing from first person to 3^rd person (and vice versa) is like a big fashion “faux pas” in the literary world.  My English teacher would hurl rocks at you for this.  Hard.
• If you’re going to use slang then be blatant about it.  Otherwise I’ll make fun of you.

Okay, I quit.  It just occurred to me that I could be here all afternoon griping about the deterioration of the English language; and I don’t have time to list all of the maladies that plague today’s young adults when it comes to writing skills.

This is meant to be funny; but take pride in the way you write.  If we don’t; then the generations that come behind us will get worse and worse.  Pick up a pen….keep a journal.  Learn to love writing again….and for heaven’s sake, learn to do it right.  Your kids (and other folks’ kids) will thank you.